Let’s all agree on something: no matter where you are in your destination wedding planning, we can all agree that wedding preparation is hard. It truly is. You have to balance your family’s expectations with you and your fiancé’s all while balancing your budget and fulfilling your own wedding planning dreams. So, before we go any further, my biggest piece of advice for you is this: Do what is most important to YOU and your fiancé.
Honestly, no matter how much advice I give you, or someone in your life gives you, you’re the only one that knows what you want for your wedding. And this day is about YOU and the person you love. So, if you read something below and realize that you feel strongly one way or another, then listen to that! Your intuition is the best way to plan your wedding. I feel like a lot of brides just need someone to tell them that the choices they are making are right. And I promise that yours are!
That being said, there are some things you need to know during your destination wedding planning. And I figured these out when I was in the midst of my own destination wedding planning when my husband and I got married on a cruise ship with 40 of our friends and family who spent a week on a cruise with us. And we wouldn’t change the way our trip was for the world – it was literally the best week I have ever had, packed with plenty of time with our friends and family. However, these tips are what I wish I had known during my own planning process. So, whether you’re in the beginning stages of your destination wedding planning or you’ve made many of your decisions already, here are eight tips to make your day the best it can possibly be.
What This Post Covers:
1. Tell Your Guests as Far Ahead of Time as Possible
One of the biggest courtesies you can allow your guests is enough time to plan out their vacation time and save up money to be able to come to your wedding! You’ll find that many people will want to celebrate with you, but the biggest hurdle for them is going to be time and money. Get ahead of that by sending a save the date or even your invitation out as soon as possible.
I know it may seem counterintuitive, as you might think you want to get all of your details ironed out before you send the invitation. But, unlike a traditional wedding, people will need to make plans or at least get the trip on their calendar and coordinate it with any other important dates they may have. For a shorter destination wedding, such as a long weekend, sending something out six to nine months is acceptable.
However, for a destination wedding that lasts from a half a week, to a week, or anything longer, let your guests know no later than a year in advance (more than that is preferable). If you give your guests less than this amount of time, you’ll find that many will not be able to make it work with all of the other commitments in their life. So be as courteous as possible and give people more time than you think they might need!
For us, we sent our wedding invitations out more than a year in advance. Our goal was to let people know that they were invited before communicating all of the details later. That way people could see whether they would even be able to come, and then they learned about the important information about the cruise later. And I also created a website where we let people know the pertinent information as we received it (such as how and where to book, how to get to the port, our wedding day schedule, etc.)
I also made a group list of everyone’s email address and would email all of our guests once we knew about something important (such as the day the cruise needed to be booked by). Six weeks before our wedding I also emailed our guests once a week, reminding them of important things such as what to pack, our wedding day plans, and how we were planning to get to the port (we hired a bus to transport everyone out of a local park-and-ride to the port itself).
Many people told us when they arrived that the emails and website were extremely helpful – they didn’t feel they needed to do much planning on their own! Many said they felt comfortable just showing up because of all of the pre-planning we did. And we wouldn’t have been able to do that without plenty of time to communicate with everyone. There are definitely other ways to communicate with people outside of an invitation, so don’t worry about inviting people too early. Before you really get into the nitty-gritty of the destination wedding planning, make sure to get those invitations out!
2. Hire a Local Wedding Coordinator
In the world of weddings, and especially if you were planning a traditional wedding, I would probably be the first to tell you that you don’t need a wedding planner. I think that, especially if you’re trying to do your wedding on a budget, a great way to save is by not hiring a wedding planning (or maybe only hiring a day-of planner instead).
But hiring a local wedding coordinator is going to be a savior during your destination wedding planning. Many couples go without ever seeing their destination wedding location (or maybe only seeing it once or twice). This means that you don’t really have a great idea of what space can hold and how best to decorate it. A local wedding planner will also be able to negotiate between your different vendors and help you figure out the specific needs your location may have. They will also help to navigate the space and make sure that your day is exactly how you planned it.
One of the best things about our own wedding day was the day-of planner. Before we even boarded our cruise, we filled out a worksheet with our preferences (such as what music we wanted to be played when, and how we wanted our ceremony and reception to flow). We then had a meeting with her the day before our ceremony to discuss our preferences. This meant that, even though we had only discussed our ideas with her the day before, we still had a beautifully executed wedding. Our planner turned into someone who handled all of our details (such as moving our guest book from location to location) without us or someone in our wedding party worrying about it – letting everyone, including us, be guests on our wedding day.
One of my favorite moments with our wedding planner was when my drink ran out during our reception. I walked over to a waiter to order another one and the words barely came out of my mouth before she walked over to the waiter and (gently) bopped him on the head with her papers. She said, “This is the bride! Make sure she has a drink in her hand at all times.” It was such a great example of someone caring about you and focusing on your needs during your day. This is just one of the many reasons why I highly recommend finding a local wedding planner you trust!
3. Do A Photoshoot at Your Location
You are probably only at your wedding location during your wedding day for a few hours, if that. This will be one of the most special places in your life – make sure that you can remember it! One of my biggest tips is to take the time to take photos at the location itself. If your wedding-day schedule doesn’t allow for you to take many photos of just the two of you, then make sure to go back. Or get creative and take some photos reminiscent of your ceremony as a keepsake. Some of your most meaningful photos of your wedding will be just the two of you in the place that you got married.
David and I got married on a cruise ship, and as part of that, we weren’t able to take many photos at our ceremony location itself. My photographer let me see our photos a few days later (he was a friend of ours and sailed with us), and when I reviewed, I realized that we hadn’t taken many photos of just the two of us! Because we were in the same location as our friends and family, our day ended up totally being about spending it with them (which was exactly what I envisioned). I also felt really strongly against a first look, which meant that our time together for photos was cut down on our wedding day.
However, I really wanted a few more photos of us in our wedding attire. I talked to my photographer, and he was more than happy to do another photoshoot with us! So, a few days later, our ship ended up having a two-day stop in Nassau – so we decided to take a few photos of us in our wedding attire with the ship in the background. And while I love the photos of our wedding day, these photos are still my favorite of us as a couple. Because we were able to take an hour to focus on the fact that we were married and taking photos together in the Bahamas! It was such a fun photoshoot and really showed off who we were as a couple.
And the best part? We took these photos only a few hours after everyone in our group went snorkeling. I think I went from shower to wedding dress and makeup in less than twenty minutes. So, this is a great example that no matter how your schedule works out during your destination wedding planning, you will be more than able to fit a quick photoshoot in!
4. Plan Additional Activities Throughout Your Trip
You don’t want the only time that you spend with your guests to be your wedding day. I would be willing to guess that one of the big reasons you are getting married during a destination wedding is because you want the focus to be on time with your family and friends! So, make sure you get that time by planning additional things to do with your guests, even if it’s brunch the morning after or something you can do together every day of the trip. I mean, hey, Meghan Markle even had wheelbarrow races and a beer pong competition a few days before her first destination wedding!
During the planning for our cruise wedding, my sister and mom insisted that we do something every day. I was very hesitant about this as one of the big reasons why we had planned a destination wedding was also to give everyone an excuse to go on a vacation. I didn’t want to continue to ask people to take time away from their trip to pay attention to us.
However, my family promised me that people would want to do things with us, so we decided to do some small activities throughout the week. The cruise departed on a Sunday, our wedding was on a Monday, and then we had five more days to plan. When we boarded, we did a bachelor/bachelorette party on Sunday night. We were married on Monday, which included a full day of activities. We then kept the day after the wedding and the day after that fairly free, as we wanted people to have a break.
But after that? We planned a newlywed game, a happy hour, a group reservation to the onboard musical, a group excursion that everyone participated in (even my 90-year-old grandparents), and a group dinner in the main dining room. And to my surprise? Almost everyone came to every event! So, during your destination wedding planning, make sure to build in some time where you can connect with your guests outside of your wedding day itself.
5. Take A Group Photo With Your Guests
You probably already know this BUT let me say it for you anyway: the people who are traveling to your destination wedding are the best people in your life. Really. People who go out of their way to use their vacation time and money to go out of their way for your destination wedding are truly your best friends. When we were planning, my sister made a point that those who would have no problem with coming on a cruise with us for a week are the friends who truly cared about us. And I would have to 100% agree with that statement.
And that’s not to say that people who didn’t come aren’t our friends. Many had great reasons as to why they couldn’t come, such as being pregnant or not having vacation time or money. But the people who did? They went out of their way to make sure that our wedding was everything we wanted it to be. And you deserve to remember these people! The group photo we took at our wedding is still one of our favorites and one of a few wedding photos we have inside our house.
Honestly, this is one of my biggest tips for ANY wedding ever, but I think even more so for a destination wedding. You don’t want to walk away from your wedding not remembering who was there and where they were in their lives on this day and during this trip. So, make sure to schedule some time during your destination wedding planning to get the whole group together!
6. Use What Your Location Offers
One of the things I started doing during the beginning of our destination wedding planning was looking at ways to make things “special.” Instead of eating in the already-included dining room, I wanted to rent a whole restaurant out. Instead of getting married on the ship, I wanted to charter a boat and get married on a beach during a port stop. I wanted to hire a private excursions company to take our group snorkeling.
And then I stopped myself and I realized: I needed to find ways to work with the ship, rather than spend extra money for the sake of it! Because it was my wedding day, I was letting myself get carried away with ideas to make the day “perfect.” But I realized – what would make our day “great” wasn’t necessarily spending extra money on things but spending time with our family and friends (and, most importantly, getting married!)
I started working with the ship to have our ceremony in the main dining room, to book a group excursion through the onboard shore excursion department and then getting a group reservation in the dining room! And not only did we save a lot of money, but no one noticed the difference. No one said afterward, “Oh I wish we had that excursion just by ourselves,” or “That dinner wasn’t nice because we were in a public area.” In fact, no one even noticed the difference! Everyone’s focus was on the experience and celebration itself.
So, learn from my mistake. During your destination wedding planning, see what the location can do for you. If you’re getting married at a resort, see if they have things already included, like a photographer onsite, a room to get ready in, or a restaurant that is already included in the package you have purchased. See if the resort can work with you rather than purchase these things separately – getting ready in a conference room vs. a bridal suite, or using an already packaged photographer rather than bringing one in, or getting a private room in a restaurant will save money without sacrificing your experience.
7. Don’t Be Afraid to Ask for What You Want!
This is the biggest tip I can provide, no matter who you are dealing with or for what you want. This is YOUR destination wedding. It’s your time. You’re inviting the guests, you’re paying for the ceremony. You deserve what you want! Now, this doesn’t mean that you can be rude and demanding. Instead, it means that you should be confident about what you ask for. For example, if they can’t get you the ceremony location you want at the time you want, or you want to dine in a specific restaurant – ask! Almost everyone will want to be as accommodating as possible. And if they’re not? Be insistent, but again, in a polite way. You are a large part of this, and there is a good reason why you are asking about this.
If you read how we planned our destination wedding, you’ll see that I had to be extremely persistent with our planner. I was never rude and tried to make sure that she knew the whole time how much we appreciated her. But throughout the process, we made sure to press for the things we felt passionate about. This persistence paid off in the end and we were able to work out our perfect wedding-day timeline.
And if you can’t get what you’re asking for? Then just be flexible! I am sure that your venue will find a great alternative for you. You won’t notice little details on your wedding day, so don’t sweat them while doing your destination wedding planning. If they can still offer you just as good of a ceremony location or reception restaurant, then take it! No one will know the difference and you’ll have just as much fun celebrating with your guests 🥰
8. Take Time After Your Wedding for YOU!
I don’t have many regrets about our wedding, but one thing I wish we had done was to take some time after our cruise to decompress and realize that we were actually married! One of the biggest mistakes of our destination wedding was not taking time for us to decompress afterward and be excited about our marriage. Our wedding consisted of a week cruising with our family and friends. And then when it was done? We went right back to work. We didn’t even take our honeymoon for a few more months.
Honestly, while I loved spending that time with the people we loved, we did deserve some time to be excited, just us. Now I’m not saying to take a whole other vacation after your destination wedding (unless you want to). But I am saying that you should take a few days where you can get away just the two of you and celebrate. Maybe head back home and grab a hotel for a day or two or just stay in your destination wedding location for a few days after everyone has left.
But make sure that you take time to celebrate, away from everyone else. They call it a honeymoon for a reason, and even if you have been together for a long time, you will still be excited about your wedding. So, make sure to cherish this feeling – you won’t ever have another time to be excited about your new marriage, just the two of you, ever again.
And Don’t Forget…
One other “unofficial” tip – don’t forget to be flexible! A wedding, like any other event, is just that: an event. There are no stories of perfect weddings out there. Events, just like life, are never perfect. There are always going to be things that will happen, no matter how hard to plan or organize.
But the good news? Nothing big or bad will happen – none of your family or your friends (or your coordinator) will let that happen! So, relax and plan the day of your dreams. And then don’t forget to laugh at the things that happen throughout the day. Hey, at our wedding, my husband stood on the wrong side of the aisle! But while it could have been something that upset us, it’s just something we look back on and laugh about. And I can guarantee that you’ll have those moments too. So, don’t stress them and enjoy your destination wedding planning – it’ll be a trip that you remember for the rest of your life!
Looking for other destination wedding tips? Check out some of my other posts below:
- Our Cruise Wedding on Norwegian Breakaway
- How We Planned Our Dream Cruise Ship Wedding
- How to Know if a Cruise Wedding is Right For You
Any Questions?
I hope these tips helped you with your destination wedding planning! If you have any more questions, feel free to ask away in the comments and I will get back to you ASAP!
Want to see more of our cruise wedding and our other travels? Take a look at my Instagram stories. Did you and your significant other get married during a destination wedding? What did you find was helpful in planning? Do you want to or are you thinking about getting married during a destination wedding? Make sure to comment below.
And don’t forget to save these destination wedding planning tips for later via the images below.
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